I have been rehabbing and training hard with my trainer, Tammy Reno (who, thank God for her, I don't know where I would be without her help and expertise), to get back to 100% strength. I never imagined it would be this difficult. After 2 ACL reconstructions, I thought this micro-fracture cartilage surgery would be a cakewalk compared to the ACL. Boy, was I wrong!! After 6 months and lots of tears and time in the gym, I've still got a ways to go. I can finally feel small improvements. The pain is still there, but I can feel my left leg getting stronger.
I am getting to that point where I need to push myself mentally and stay strong emotionally, which is very difficult for me to do. Exactly a year ago I was in the best shape of my life and here I am now, struggling to bend my knee in a lunge and still, not quite allowed to run or jump (June 5th I should get the release from the doc... I really can't WAIT ANY LONGER!!). I'm frustrated at how out-of-shape I feel and the pain that still occurs on a day-to-day basis. All I can do now is keep pushing.... keep pushing and keep pushing.
I love the movie "Finding Nemo" well one because it's obviously awesome and two because the quote: "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming." And sometimes, it's as SIMPLE AS THAT! Keep on keeping on, perservere, and don't give up!
As much as I sometimes want to throw in the towel, I won't ever let myself do that. Despite the tears, the doubt, the pain and the fear, I won't give up. It may take me a year or more to be back to 100% athletic shape, but I can do it. One day at a time. I know it won't be easy... but it will most definitely be worth it! And the things I'm looking forward to doing most: skiing, DANCE PARTIES, running, mountainbiking, and being free from pain!
Yeah. Can't wait to slide a box and hit a jump once again. That will be a WONDERFUL day for me! :)
